Due Date: Monday, April 15, 2013; 10am
1. Have you ever had to use multiple management
styles to solve a conflict?
2. In any conflict, has your relationship ever
been strengthened or weakened with the outcome of the conflict with
the opposing party?
1. Yes, I have had to use multiple management styles to solve conflicts before. I usually only have to do that when the conflict is over something more serious rather than something minor.
ReplyDelete2. In past conflicts, my relationship has been both strengthened and weakened with the person I was disagreeing with. It just depended on what the conflict was over, how strong my relationship with the other person was to begin with, and how we both handled the conflict and resolving it.
1) I usually have to use more than one management style to solve any conflict. In my experience, using one style doesn't always satisfy everyone involved and in some extreme cases can make the conflict worse. To decrease the tension in any conflict, I try to listen to both sides first and suggest a compromise. Sometimes, this is the only step that I need to take only if the issue isn't a major problem. I also try to get the people arguing to collaborate with each other and work out their problems together. I also tend to use the accommodation technique when I think my needs weren't as important as others. Over the past days, I have seen this style used more and more. For example, I observe in a 5th grade classroom for my education class and during a test two kids called me over because they both wanted a highlighter. One of the kids offered to let the other use it for day as long as she got it back after school. This is an example of an accommodation technique. She gave up what she wanted because she knew her classmate wanted it more.
ReplyDelete2) For me, it depends on the situation and the person that I am arguing with. Usually, if my friendship was strong before the argument we didn't have any problems resolving it. If anything, our friendship strengthened and we grew from it. For instant ace, when my best friend of fourteen years got into some trouble with her other friends it upset me. I tried to talk to her about and we ended up have a pretty big argument. She realized that I was concerned for her and we have been better friends since. During this conflict I tried to compromise with her as well as offer some alternatives that she could be doing instead of what she was doing with her other friends. She appreciated the concern and agreed to the compromise.
1. Yes I have had to use more than one type. When solving an issue I like to be the compromiser and please everyone. If I were in a situation where someone was very hostile and ignorant, I would take the avoider standpoint, to avoid any type of hard feelings against me. Also sometimes in situations these two situations mix if you feel a certain part of the argument is getting very heated you can be quiet until things cool down and then pick back up at trying to find a compromise for both people.
ReplyDelete2. Usually I would say it depends on who I am arguing with. When I argue with my best friend, sister, or mom. I am always able to mend our relationship after because we both care for each other and our relationship. If it is someone who is not very close to me, sometimes things can get awkward and the relationship weakens because of this.
Usually using only one management style doesn't work to solve conflicts and so I use more than one, sometimes without realizing it. Usually I am an accommodator, but sometimes I have to also use other management styles. Sometimes if an argument is very aggressive and isn't getting anywhere or being productive, I might take an avoider management style and then pick up the argument later.
ReplyDeleteI try hard to make the outcome of conflicts positive and although sometimes it doesn't work out that way, usually after a fight most of my relationships are strengthened. Of course, it depends on the relationship and the level of closeness. For example, my close friends and my boyfriend are examples of people if we have a disagreement, we are closer after things are worked out. If it's just an acquaintance, things might get uncomfortable or the relationship might just disintegrate.
1. In a lot of conflicts I feel like I use more than one type. When an issue is brought to me, my initial reaction is usually to either avoid or to accommodate. I don't like conflict, but in things that are important to discuss, I open up and then I start trying to collaborate with the other person to find a solution. In other conflicts, when I feel it's better to just go along with the other person, I'm a lot more likely to just accommodate to what they want.
ReplyDelete2. In most conflicts with people I'm close to and who are important to me, the relationship is strengthened. With my boyfriend, when either of us feels that the other is acting in a way we don't like, or treating the other in a negative way, we sit down and discuss it. Usually, the one who was acting out didn't realize what they were doing and they say that they will change the behavior. If they knew what they were doing, then we will discuss why and how they're feeling. Once we get all the feelings out, it's easier to understand and reach some agreement. With my mom, she usually tells me when I'm acting in a way that she doesn't like, or she feels isn't good for me. She always seems to know how I'm feeling, sometimes even before I do. We talk through it and find a more positive solution to the problem.
1.Yes, I have had to use more than one management style to solve a conflict before. I usually try to not avoid the conflict at hand by collaborating, because if the problem is avoided, nothing is ever going to get solved. I ensure to the best of my ability that the concerns of both persons are taken care of and that a solution is applied that benefits the needs and wants of each person. This is just one type of conflict management style that I use. Another style that goes hand-in-hand with collaboration is compromising. Compromising involves reaching an acceptable decision and agreement between both persons, forming a solution that involves mutual agreement rather than competing to see which person has a better approach to solving the conflict. The only major difference between collaborating and compromising is that collaborating involves more in-depth investigation of finding a middle-ground solution that benefits both parties, rather than just compromising, which involves less depth and may include a simple exchange of values. An example of a situation where I had to use both collaborating and compromising conflict-management style techniques was when my sister and my dad were having an argument about who got to use the computer at a certain time. I used collaboration by setting up a schedule of specific times that my sister would use the computer and specific times my dad would use the computer. I then compromised by making sure that it was acceptable to both my dad and sister that the assigned times didn’t conflict with anything. They both agreed to this approach, so I had collaborated and compromised successfully, developing a solution that would benefit both of them.
ReplyDelete2.Yes, my relationship has been strengthened with the conflict of the opposing party. An example of this is when my best friend and I have disagreements. One time, her boyfriend was disrespecting me whenever I hung out with her, and he always had to come along with. I talked it through with her, and she had said that she wasn’t even aware he was acting in such a manner. She agreed to balance the time she spent with her boyfriend and the time she spent with me, and also to watch his behavior more closely to ensure that I wasn’t getting hurt by his words/actions. Therefore, our relationship was strengthened and continues to be strengthened through our disagreements. However, sometimes my relationships are weakened as well. My roommate and I used to be close at the beginning of the year, but now we are almost like strangers because conflict led to more fights, and finally discontinuing our friendship we had developed due to different values and beliefs.
1. I have had to use more than one management style to solve a conflict. I feel that it is difficult to solve a conflict using only one management style. I mostly collaborate and compromise. I am the kind of person who likes to satisfy everyone. I do not like to let people down. I like to find solutions that either fully or partially satisfy both parties. When fully satisfying both parties will not work, then compromising is necessary. However, depending on the situation, I have most likely used all types of management styles. If I do not feel comfortable addressing a conflict, I will avoid it.
ReplyDelete2. My relationships have been both strengthened and weakened by past conflicts. The strengthening or weakening of a relationship will depend on the situation at hand. I always try to have conflicts end in a positive way. I feel that the closer I am with a person, usually the stronger the relationship gets after a conflict. If the person and I am able to work the conflict out, the relationship gets stronger by making it through problems. For example, I have had arguments with my boyfriend, but after talking and working out the conflict, our relationship always seems to get stronger. If I have conflicts with people that I am less close with, the situation might become awkward and the relationship will be weakened.
1. I have not experienced a conflict in which I needed more than one management style. An example of a time when I used a management style was when my girlfriend and I were talking about what we wanted to do on a Friday night. She wanted to go eat somewhere and I wanted to go watch a movie. We decided that we would go eat first and then watch a movie. The result was a win-win in which we both got what we wanted. I am not sure how more than one style would be used because each outcome is distinct.
ReplyDelete2. Throughout my life, I have had relationships strengthened and weakened as the result of a conflict. An example of a time when a relationship of mine was weakened because of a conflict is when my friend had agreed to take a movie back to the video store after I let him borrow. He watched it and forgot to take it back giving my account a late fee. It was not a big deal but the result weakened our relationship. A time when my relationship strengthened was when my girlfriend wanted to go to a party and I did not. We talked and she convinced me to go even though I was not happy about it. I ended up having a good time and met new people. It strengthened our relationship and I trust her opinion more.
1. I have had to use multiple management styles in order to solve a conflict. I’ve realized that just using one management style doesn’t always leave everyone on good terms. I like to think of several situations in which a conflict can be resolved and think about what the outcome can turnout to be. Then obviously choose the one that will satisfy everyone.
ReplyDelete2. I would say it depends on the conflict. In past conflicts I’ve had the issue where in a relationship it would always weaken and strengthen it wasn’t always more than the other. I say it depends on what is important and to hear things out. Then there is also that situation where it is a conflict that I would rather ignore, then most of the time the relationship would weaken, because nothing is being compromised.
1) Once two of my best friends were fighting and I became the middleman during this conflict. I would run back and forth from two different houses trying to get the two of them at least agree on something that would be gratifying for both of them. When the collaboration was not working this started to go downhill. I ended up starting to avoid the subject matter at all. Instead of trying to talk things out, I let things drag out to the point the argument was forgotten.
ReplyDelete2) With the conflict that I talked about in the first question, the relationships between us three never went back to how it was before the fight. With the way it ended, no one was bringing up the fact that a fight took place; though my two friends were no longer friends with each other. This caused me to split my time between them, and eventually I grew apart with one of them and stopped hanging out with her. My relationship with the other one though is very strong till this day.
1. I think that using more than one management style can be best, but it is very situational. I tent to stick to the collaboration and the controlling. If collaboration doesn't work, then I become more controlling. This usually works with most conflicts.
ReplyDelete2. Again, this is very situational. Depending on the conflict and how I chose to deal with it, I have seen both. Most of my conflicts end up with things being the way they were before. There are the slim few when things get way worse. There was a particular argument that I remember that has ended a friendship, and we no longer talked to each other, but there have also been conflicts that have brought me closer to someone because it made them disclose how they really felt. I think that both situations can occur regularly.
1.) Yes only one time before have I had to use multiple management skills because the conflict that i was put in was much more complex then a conflict like that is my shirt and I would like it back.
ReplyDelete2.) The only really big conflict that I have been in that would either strengthen or weaken my relationship weakened my relationship with my best friend because she didn't want to make an effort to talk about the situation.
1)I have used more than one conflict style when trying to solve a conflict. The styles that I mostly use are compromise, collaborate, and accommodate. I always start off trying to collaborate, so that hopefully the conflict can end with both sides being happy and the conflict can be resolved positively. If that doesn't work I then try to compromise, it may not be a win-win, but at least you give a little and take a little and things can still work out positively. However, if that does not work I resort to accommodating and just let the other person do what they want, because I like to please people and sometimes it's just not worth the fight, it is sometimes easier to get passed the situation and move on.
ReplyDelete2) I think that when I can collaborate and compromise that is when it strengthens my relationships, because I know that we can work things out again in the future if need be. But when I have to accommodate and just go along with they want, it can strengthen and weaken. It is strengthening, because sometimes it shows that I care about them so much that I'm willing to just knuckle down and go with their side. While sometimes, it weakens, because I realize how ignorant to change or compromise and these people make me realize that maybe this person and I shouldn't hang out or work together, whatever the situation may be.
I find it is helpful to use about 3 of the styles. When one doesn't work I go on to the next one. I usually start with a collaborative attitude. However, after a collaborative attitude doesn't work I switch to more of a controller; the reason for this being, if no one is going to step up I will. For example, in another of my classes we had a group project. During the first part of the assignment no one was really seeing eye-to-eye, after talk with the group they let me take the lead in the project.
ReplyDeleteI definitely think so, as the old saying goes, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" my girlfriend and I fight every once in a while and we are able to find out more dynamics of our relationship that we never knew existed. Fighting is healthy (as long as it is with in reason) because you get all the cards out on the table and can go from there. Although sometimes it can hurt relationships, I personally have never experienced this.
1. Depending on the context of the situation, I sometimes have to use multiple managing styles to resolve a conflict. For example, if there is a conflict between an authority figure and I, I will act as a compromiser. But if it's a friend who I'm not very close with, I might push my ideas more or make a compromise.
ReplyDelete2. My best friend and I do a very good job at resolving conflicts. While I'm away at school, it is difficult to come home for a weekend and balance my time evenly between family, friends, and boyfriend. This is something I struggle with. This weekend, while I was home, it became a serious conflict between me and m best friend. We discussed how we both felt and we put ourselves in each others' shoes. By doing this, we were able to see why the other was upset and we resolved the issue.